Hermione’s Revenge
by AddisonRae
Summary: Hermione is on the receiving end of a prank. She is determined to get revenge. But what If the culprit is the least likely person imaginable? Might be a one-shot. Depends. SSHG.
1. Default Chapter

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Title: Hermione's Revenge

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Author: AddisonRae

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Warnings: mild language

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Rating: PG (so far)

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Genre: Romance, humor

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Disclaimer: I don't own it! *smirks* 

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Summary: Hermione is on the receiving end of a prank. She is determined to get revenge. But what If the culprit is the least likely person imaginable? Might be a one-shot. Depends. SS/HG.

I marched through the open door to Harry and Ron's room at Number 12 Grimmauld Place. How dare they! Sure, they though it was funny, I saw no humor in the situation. Frankly, I saw it as humiliating, embarrassing; degrading, mortifying... did I mention humiliating? Oh, Gods, why do they do this to me? What have I done to them? Just because I push them to actually study they decide to retaliate! What kind of a word is retaliate anyway? I mean, it doesn't exactly strike fear into the--I'm rambling! You see what they do to me? Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes…

I marched through the open door to Harry and Ron's room at Number 12 Grimmauld Place. I pushed Harry down on to the bed and grabbed Ron by the scruff of his neck (which is quite difficult considering his height), and threw him down as well. In the words of the great Ricky Ricardo, they had some splainin' to do!

"How dare you!" I hissed.

Both of my very tall male friends cowered under my furious gaze. It made me smirk, inwardly of course, to think they were still scared little boys inside, afraid I was going to unleash my unholy hormonal wrath on them. Boys.

"Hermione, we swear it wasn't us!"

"Oh, boys! This has your handiwork written all over it!" I yelled.

"Herm, what exactly has our handiwork written all over it?"

I paused mid-breath, preparing for another rant. I looked down into Harry's bewildered face. Ron would lie, he'd try to at least, but Harry always confessed in the end. Looking at his confused face I realized I had the wrong men. No matter. 

"Fred! George!" I bellowed.

I ran up the stairs to their room, and found them in a corner pouring over an order form for Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes. I grabbed each twin by an ear, and pulled them out into the hallway, ignoring their meek protests and cries of pain.

"What did you think you were doing?" I sneered.

"Er…working?" One said.

"On our monthly report?" another ventured.

They cocked their heads to the side and gave me identical looks of mild fascination as they regarded my red face and flyaway hair. George glanced at Fred, Fred glanced at George, and they nodded and bent in closer until they were right in front of my face, examining my pupils. Damn. Wrong again.

"Sorry, boys. Wrong culprit." I muttered. The twins grinned understandingly and went back to their monthly report.

I stormed down the hall, beating on Charlie's door and then Bill's. They came out, confused looks on their faces, but smiled when they saw me standing in the hallway looking up at them. Heh. Just wait.

"Why?" I asked furiously.

"ER…" they muttered simultaneously.

"Damn! Sorry!" I muttered.

I proceeded to stomp down the hall, leaving Bill and Charlie scratching their heads in my wake. I froze when I saw a flash of red hair in my room. An evil smirk flashed across my face. I ran in and cornered Virginia Ann Weasley. She slumped against the wall and stared at me in wonder as I glared down at her.

"I am going to kill you!"

"Herm-" Ginny started.

"Did you think it was funny?"

"'Mione--" she persisted.

"I didn't think it was Ginny!"

Ginny pointed to some point behind me, watching me with mild amusement etched on her pretty face. I turned to find myself staring at a black chest. My gaze traveled upwards to face a very amused Severus Snape. Damn. 

"Miss Granger are you now done terrorizing every occupant of this house?" he asked in that silky drawl of his.

"Almost, sir. Draco is living here as well. I should have thought of him in the first place. It was such a Slytherin thing to do." I snapped, trying to push past him.

He grabbed each of my shoulders, firmly but gently holding me in place. He stared into my face for a moment, and then he looked over my head and gave Ginny an amused smirk. 

"You were right, Miss Weasley, she is blind. And stubborn." he said.

"Excuse me?" I hissed, clearly indignant at my current situation. There was major revenge to be dealt with here, and a certain blonde Slytherin was soon to be on the receiving end of it.

"Tut tut, Miss Granger." Snape drawled, "It wasn't Draco."

"Oh, it wasn't" I mumbled angrily.

"No."

"Then who was it, then?"

"Me."

I looked up at Severus Snape's face, shocked. Him? No! It couldn't be! He was a teacher! He hadn't been my teacher for three years, but still! Why on earth would he steal my--

"Miss Granger, if you want your belongings back, I suggest you stop by my room. I'm sure we can _negotiate _something.," he whispered.

Damn his voice! It can do things to a woman when it's not taking off house points or assigning detentions. He looked me up and down slowly, before letting his hands slide down my arms. My insides turned to putty at his touch, and after a sharp intake of breath he seemed satisfied, and left the room.

I stood in blank shock, watching his receding figure before he finally disappeared from sight. Him? Him of all people! Why? I heard a derisive snort and whipped around to see Ginny surveying me through twinkling eyes.

"He asked for my advice." she said nonchalantly, "what exactly was it he stole?"

"My…M…"

"Sorry?" Ginny chorused innocently.

"My underwear! He stole every bra and panty I own besides the ones I'm wearing now!" I snapped indignantly.

"Even the red ones?" Ginny giggled.

"Yes!" I hissed.

"Hmm."

"What?"

"I only told him to steal your books."

With that, Ginny got up and left the room, stopping at the door to give me a wink before bouncing off down the hall. I stood there a moment, before adopting a determined expression and storming out the door. I had negotiations with a certain Potions Master, and he hates waiting. But keep I mind, Hell hath no fury like Hermione Granger scorned.


	2. 2

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Two:

"SNAPE!" 

I, Twenty year old Hermione Granger, pounded my fist repeatedly against the polished wood of the door to Severus Snape's room at Number 12 Grimmauld Place. I waited impatiently for him to open the door, myhand on her hip and my foot tapping in it's aggravated rhythm. I harumped impatiently and switched sides, my hand now resting on my right hip and my left foot tapping in it's own accord. Finally, the door slowly swung open to reveal a very smug Snape.

"Miss Granger." he nodded at me, gesturing for me to come in.

I stormed past him angrily, and he closed the door behind me. I watched warily as he cast a strong sealing charm on the door, followed by a silencing charm as well. He turned to face me and I raised a skeptic eyebrow in perfect imitation of his own trademark look. 

"Miss Granger, here to negotiate, then?"

"No!" I snapped, "I'm here to take back my things!"

"Miss Granger, surely you know you will not be getting them back until I say?" Snape said dryly, motioning for me to have a seat.

I sat, looking around his rather welcoming bedroom. There was a large four poster bed in the far corner, warmly decorated in rich greens and blacks. It didn't look nearly as intimidating as I expected, then again, I didn't really know anything about him. All I knew was he was a panty thief. 

"Alright, what are your demands? Information on how to one-up Harry and Ron? Perhaps a way to repay them for their years of disrespect?" I hissed.

"I want you, Miss Granger, to stop scowling at me and listen." Severus smirked as I wiped the scowl off my face and started at him in surprise.

"What. Do. You. Want?" I hissed.

"You." Severus whispered silkily. 

"W-What?" I yelled.

I jumped up out of my chair and he advanced on me. I very quickly found myself with my back to the wall, much to Severus' amusement. I, Hermione Granger, best friend of Harry Potter, key player in Voldemort's defeat and brightest witch to grace Hogwarts in years, was scared shitless.

"Hermione, look at me." Severus said quietly, all traces of disdain gone from his voice.

I slowly looked up to meet his eyes, he placed a hand on the side of my face and he leaned in . NONONO! Wait, this…wasn't…oh, hell he's a bloody good kisser! Severus slowly pulled away, looking at me to judge a reaction, but one never came. I stood numb with shock, staring at him blankly. He stepped back, and sat back down in his chair, sighing heavily.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

"No. you shouldn't have." I agreed quietly.

"Your clothes have been returned" he said with a wave of his wand.

"Severus, I…"

I stood against the wall for a moment, weighing my options. This man had tortured me for six years, the last of my school years he completely ignored me. And yet, I'd never noticed the way his eyes could express so much, while his face remained completely blank. The way his mouth twitched at the corners when he tried not to smile. The way…Damn, he was a good kisser!

In that split second, I made up my mind. I crossed the room quickly, almost as if I was afraid I'd lose my nerve, sat in Severus'' lap and kissed him. He froze momentarily before hungrily returning my attentions. I felt his toungue tease at my lips and willingly allowed it's entrance. He explored my mouth with the passion and confidence he did everything, but there was a certain tenderness as well, one that I had never seen before from him. 

Severus pulled back slowly, a smile lighting up his face, and pulled me up off of the chair and into his arms. He looked at me, as if asking, and I nodded my consent. He carried me to the bed and the rest of the night was playful and sensual exploration. 

I guess I didn't need my underwear after all.


End file.
